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<title>“It’ll probably be worse.” by grapejuiceantidote (riddleb9y)</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30145503">“It’ll probably be worse.”</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/riddleb9y/pseuds/grapejuiceantidote'>grapejuiceantidote (riddleb9y)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Gotham (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - High School, Autistic Edward Nygma, Bisexuality, Cheating, Endgame Oswald Cobblepot/Jim Gordon, F/F, F/M, Gen, Hurt Edward Nygma, Jim is a Little Shit, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, barbara kean is a good bro, but il him, like everyone minus oswald, lucius fox is great, nygmobblepot fans im so sorry, sorry - Freeform</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 12:01:15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,146</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30145503</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/riddleb9y/pseuds/grapejuiceantidote</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>highschool au</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jim Gordon/Leslie Thompkins, Lucius Fox/Edward Nygma, Mario Falcone/Leslie Thompkins, Oswald Cobblepot/Edward Nygma, Oswald Cobblepot/Jim Gordon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>“It’ll probably be worse.”</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>this is sooooo old im sorryyy</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The front door had been open, and Ed assumed it was on purpose. That Jim remembered their study session and was inviting him inside because Mrs.Gordon was out of town. Ed found his way to Jim's room, and the moment he entered, he wished he hadn't. </p><p>Barbara was a good listener and would let Ed cry before smacking him back into shape. Plus, she had to attend church on Sundays, so she’d be awake. The walk wasn't long and slinking through the fence saved time, he's always been good about sneaking and was smart enough to avoid her parents. Going up to her balcony, he made sure to keep his eyes shut, because the curtains weren't drawn, and seeing Barbra naked was the last thing this morning needed, he knocked on the window. </p><p>The moment the window crept open he was bombarded with questions while she ushered him inside. Eventually, she caught on to his lack of response, laying him on her bed, and rubbing his back. The rhythm of her hand was like stimming, constant and methodical. After a while she offered him water and tissues, jokingly asking if he'd prefer wine. Her smooth condolences coaxed an explanation out of him. When she got the whole picture, she swore and ranted about ‘typical Jim’. The bashing made mad him felt better. Less hurt, anger replacing his sorrow. They talked until he regretfully remembered his curfew. She offered to give him a lift and he agreed on the condition that she'd drop him off on the street before his house. Her face darkened but she agreed. The Nasthon's parenting habits were common knowledge, but Barbara understood. Her parents were just as verbally abusive as his physically.</p><p>Ed began working on the chemistry project. It was his grade too and he couldn’t cry anymore, he wasn’t weak and he didn't need love. </p><p>…..</p><p>Monday morning he sat in Chemistry, loathing the arrival of a certain asshole. When Jim shuffled into the room with a guilty expression, Ed started the conversation for him.</p><p>“Either-either you tell Lee, or I will. Understood?” He ignored the tremble in his voice.</p><p>Ignoring the warning, Jim slumped. “Ed, I am sorry. I feel awful it should have never-”</p><p>He cut Jim off, “It doesn’t matter. If Oswald loved me in the first place, he would’ve ignored his crush on you.” Ed sniffed, looking down at the complete project on top of the desk. “I finished it. As long as Harvey has the vocabulary list, we’ll get an A.”</p><p>Harvey came to class, taking his seat without saying a word to Jim. He handed Ed his work, clapping him on the shoulder and giving Jim an exasperated look. Ed seemed so lifeless, and it was harsh, and Harvey barely tolerated Ed.</p><p>…..</p><p>The class was dismissed after 55 of the worst minutes in Jim’s life. He wanted to hurry off and hide his shame, but Harvey caught him straight after class. </p><p>“What the hell, Jim?!” Harvey asked, gripping his shoulder mid escape.</p><p>His shoulders relaxed, and he turned to face his best friend. “I screwed up Harvey. Ed walked in on Oswald and I, the morning after Oswald and I.”</p><p>“No shit Sherlock! I thought you and Lee were together and penguin was fucking geek boy?”</p><p>Jim winced at the reminder of Lee and Ed. He had feelings for Oswald, but he’d hurt two people for a one-night stand with no guarantees. “I feel bad, Harvey. I do but I can't fix it. Not right now. It’s too soon.”</p><p>"Well you should get to it soon." </p><p>…..<br/>
Jim told Leslie the truth during their break. She took the news with grace, delivering a pink hand print to his cheek and telling him they were through. She knew Jim had been pulling away. The cheating made sense to her, but she felt terrible about Ed. He was oblivious, always letting his heart decide. Realizing Oswald’s lack of faith had probably torn him in two. </p><p>Her concern was validated in their third period, where Ed sat being consoled by Kirsten Kringle. Approaching the corner of the room, she crouched down, hand on his knee. He flinched before recognizing her. Kirsten gave a weak smile as Ed enveloped her in a tight hug muttering apologies on behalf of their exes. </p><p>“Leslie, I am so sorry. I know how you felt about Jim and I wanted to tell you first but that would’ve been rude and-”</p><p>She shushed him, returning the embrace. “You have no fault here, Ed. they decided to fuck around.” She pulled back, laughing at his disheveled hair that was ungelled and in coils. “You’re a mess.”</p><p>“And your makeup hasn't smeared.” He commented bluntly. </p><p>Kirsten gave her a concerned look like she was just realizing this for herself. Jim and Lee were supposed to be high school sweethearts. She didn’t understand Lee’s indifference when Ed was in pieces. In her opinion, Oswald’s actions were predictable. Everyone took notice of the odd relationship between Jock Gordon and Goth Cobblepot. Oswald had pinned after Jim before he and Ed began dating. Jim, however, had seemed straight and uninterested, so didn’t Lee feel betrayed?</p><p>Shrugging, Leslie responded, “I guess I saw it coming.”</p><p>“And I call myself smart,” Ed remarked, his voice cracking.</p><p>…..</p><p>By lunch, all of Gotham Academy knew. Ed had received several remarks about 'not being able to hold a freak down’. He skipped the line for lunch and headed straight to where all of his friends sat. Jim and Oswald seemed purposefully apart, and the gesture made him sick. Choosing to sit between Tabitha and Lucius, he ignored the rest. Tabitha hated him, but she was Barabra’s girlfriend, so bashing Jim came naturally. And Foxy, well he was just smart and soft, without drama or overbearing concern.</p><p>Oswald didn’t catch the silence's hint. Two minutes into the tension of the century, he spoke, making the whole group groan.</p><p>“Are we going to sit and ignore the elephant in the room, because I’d rather not.” Several glares turned to him, but he continued. “I cheated, Jim cheated.” The pointed tip of Barbra’s shoe collided with Oswald’s leg. “Ow!”</p><p>“Shut up, Penguin.” Harvey said to Oswald, though he was staring at Jim, daring him to speak on Oswald’s behalf.</p><p>“Just say something Ed, please?”</p><p>Straightening out his shoulders and tilting his head up, Ed met Oswald’s eyes. “We’re over. You know it, I know it, Jimbo fucking knows it, the whole school knows. I am not having some dramatic quarrel , you have my blessing to continue screwing.” His malice surprises him, but he doesn’t wait for Oswald’s response, he just stalks off. </p><p>With a deep sigh, Lucius stood. He knew inserting himself between two extreme teens with questionable tendencies was stupid, but he couldn’t stop caring for Ed's safety. </p><p>“I’ll check on him.” He announced, packing away his lunch and book, glaring at Oswald.</p><p>“Sure, go and save the day,” Oswald sneered, earning another kick from Barbra. “Ow!”</p><p>Lucius shot Harvey a pointed look saying, ‘help me fix these idiots for fucks sake’. Before walking away. </p><p>Receiving the message loud and clear, Harvey groaned. “Oswald you need to apologize to Lee for screwing Jim. Jim you need to talk about what happened instead of acting hopeless. Lee dumped you. Oswald, Nygma dumped you. Figure out the next step, or I will get Conunsler Essen involved, you crazy bastards.”</p><p>…..</p><p>Jim decided that, as usual, Harvey made a fair point. He told Oswald to follow him and didn’t answer the other teen’s questions until they were in an empty classroom. </p><p>“We need to talk.” He grudgingly cleared his throat. </p><p>With cased blue eyes, Oswald nodded. “I feel awful but I am a man driven by my emotions. You know I have feelings for you.”</p><p>“What about Ed, Lee?” Jim crossed his arms, uncomfortable with the conversation already. </p><p>“We lost them,” Reaching out, Oswald grasped Jim’s hand. “For some reason we decided to given them up for each other. And it was wrong but maybe not saying anything sooner was worse.”</p><p>A wave of guilt crushed Jim as he listened to the sincerity of Oswald’s tone. He’d never bargained for trust with Oswald. It was too precious, even when they first met. “How do you know anything good will come out of this?.”</p><p>And in an instant, Oswald was holding him close, arms tight around his chest. “I don't know, but I be here for better or worse.”</p><p>“It’ll probably be worse.”</p><p>“I know.”</p><p>…..<br/>
Since seventh grade, the bond between Lucius and Edward remained balanced. Edward was clueless with emotions, and Lucius could comprehend Ed’s. Not to mention, on an intellectual level, the two were matched. Lucius kept Ed’s interest, and Ed rejuvenated compassion in the other teen. Freshman year, Lucius came out to Edward as bi.  He knew Edward’s father was close-minded, but Ed bi himself and received the news with delight. Then Oswald came around, and Ed was lovesick.  So Lucius stood by, occasionally dating but with no real commitment. That's not to say he viewed Oswald's cheating as an opportunity. He would’ve let them together forever if it made Ed happy.</p><p>He found Ed behind the greenhouse, muttering to himself incoherently, and twisting a Rubix cube. Lucius’s first instinct was to approach and comfort, but touch could worsen Ed’s panic, so he slowed himself and settled for sitting a foot or so away.</p><p>“Are you okay?” His voice caught Ed’s attention, making him jolt slightly. He received a hurried nod, but nothing verbal. He tried again. “Do you want to sign instead.” He was rusty, but Ed had taken a class when Oswald’s mother had taken in a kid named Martin, who was mute. It helped with his vocal arrest at times.</p><p>“No,” Ed whispered, still avoiding eye contact. “I am physically well.” Something about that must’ve amused Ed because he queried a smile. “Don't get sweet on me, Foxy.”</p><p>Lucius had always loathed that nickname. Oswald shot daggers at him every time Ed used it with a wink. It had originated from a poor joke about Ed having a kink for librarians. He bit his lip and batted his eyelashes, looking Lucius up at down before stage whispering he was ‘Foxy’. At the time, everyone had doubled over in laughter, but the stupid nickname stuck.</p><p>“I'm not being sweet I am your friend and I care about you. Is touch okay right now?”</p><p>Ed weighed the idea before nodding. He’s been hugged so many times in the past 24 hours he was becoming accustomed, plus Lucius had good cologne and soft sweaters. </p><p>Sunk into Lucius's natural warmth he groaned. “I can fill a room or just one heart, others can have me but I can’t be shared. What am I?” </p><p>“Love?”</p><p>Frantically shaking his head no, Ed corrected him, “The answer is loneliness.” He buried his face deeper into Lucius' chest.</p><p>Tightening his hold on Ed, Lucius shook his head no. “You’re not alone Ed, I see you. You’re here.”<br/>
…..</p><p>After school Oswald caught Lee prepping sports med. equipment. He dragged himself to her station and sat, not minding her curious gaze. He kicked his foot back and forth, unsure. The serotonin increase from him and Jim’s recent realization made him seem apathetic, but he felt terrible. He liked Ed, and he appreciated Leslie as a person, but years of waiting made crushing them thoughtlessly. </p><p>When he opened his mouth, the vocal cords tightened, “I, uh. We need to talk.”</p><p>She turned to him, her lips forming a firm frown line. “Do we?”</p><p>“I apologize for,” He gripped the fabric of his pant leg. “Being an adulterous whore?”</p><p>Zipping up the sports med bag, she tossed it over her shoulder. “It’s fine, honestly Oswald. I’ve known that you and Jim had something.” She pinched her nose, “I was going to break up with him today actually.”</p><p>That news stung Oswald. For a moment he wanted to yell at her for even considering Jim wasn’t good enough for her, but he controlled the anger. “Was it because you knew?”</p><p>Lee bowed her head. “Yes. Also, Mario Falcone asked me out. He thought you and Jim were a thing. He wasn’t trying to make me leave Jim but-”</p><p>“You still wanted to.” Oswald finished for her, understanding the idea. </p><p>His affection for Jim was overpowering. Ed was his best friend, and to a certain degree Oswald loved him, but Jim was someone he loved romantically. Ed was someone who understood him and accepted him, which didn’t happen often. He’d gotten them mixed while believing Jim couldn’t reciprocate his feelings. He’d been wrong, and the curtain that unveiled the truth also revealed a mess.</p><p>“Yeah, I guess I never really loved Jim. I just cared for him more than the average person.”</p><p>Pursing his lips, Oswald hummed in agreement.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>should I add to this? is this plotish? do I like all the ships? who knows..</p></blockquote></div></div>
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